The Story of Change – Tuaha Ibn Jalil

No doubt, the story of the change of different Muslims and reverts around the world inspires us and propels us towards Allah. Our faith and soul are once again enlightened with the love of Allah and our purpose for serving in this world.

Following the topic of our discussion, today we will read about the life story of one of the renowned speaker, counselor, and country head of Youth Club, Tuaha Ibn Jalil. We will also learn what inspired him to shift his life from being an energetic young boy who aims to live life at its fullest to the man of Akhirah. We will also study what were the hurdles and challenges he faced during this transformation and how he overcame those hurdles.

A Glimpse from the Past Life

While sharing his past life, Tuaha Ibn Jalil said, I was a man with the belief that you are going to live this life for once, so why not enjoy it to its fullest? Why not live and explore every moment? I was living my life with the mantra of YOLO in my head, “You Only Live Once”.

He also shared that he once was a person who would spend his life by means of enjoying it and entertaining himself and others around him. He used to believe in doing the things his nafs (inner-self) directed him to do without thinking about the consequences.

Life in College

While talking about life in college and university, Tuaha Ibn Jalil said my life has been a rollercoaster ride. Being a son of SSG Commando, I have all the privileges in life both financially and authority-wise. My father always encouraged me to try everything in life and no doubt, that part of my life gave me a huge amount of confidence.

I was encouraged by my father to try every sports activity at a younger age from swimming to horse riding, I got control of both in no time. I was always advised by my father to conquer my fears.

Life in University

For higher education, Tuaha Ibn Jalil moved to Islamabad and followed the same pattern in university era too, in which life was all about eating and partying and that is how he used to spend his time.

He said, “I was living life without fear, worry, or a single thought for the life after this life, the eternal life that is never going to end. In university, my life was all about exploring every corner of the city in my free time. We being the youth were fearless and we used to roam around here and there all day without keeping tabs on time.

Enjoying the food was one of my hobbies so I along with my friends used to scan all the restaurants around Islamabad. We were so fearless that we used to visit malls and marts and we used to take away the food we wanted without even paying for it. For this very reason, the police of Islamabad were after us most of the time as we used to take so many risks in our lives because life meant nothing to us. At the end of the day, I used to have no fear of Allah in my heart and zero prayer count.

The Quest for Inner Peace

Then came a time in my life when I was looking for peace in anything and everything. I was exploring different things to keep my heart at peace. While looking for peace, I explored gang fights to see whether investing all my energy would give me peace or not.

I used to travel a lot to explore any environment that would give me the peace and comfort my heart was yearning for. There were no prayers or remembrance of Allah SWT in my journey of finding peace.

While talking about his quest for inner peace, he also shared that there came a time in his life when he used to pray to Allah to put him through some hard times, tribulations, or hardships so that he could turn his face away from this monotonous life.

Despite having everything in life, every luxury and access to each and everything that is a dream of an ordinary person, something was still missing from my life and that was peace of heart and true happiness.

Effect of Sins in My Life

Tuaha Ibn Jalil also shared that whenever he used to delve deeper into the life of sins, he used to face hard times. Sometimes it would come in the shape of an accident, sometimes heartbreak or the loss of a family member. He said that these incidents used to hurt him so deeply that he had to turn back to Allah to find peace. As Allah has mentioned in the Quran:

وَلَنُذِيقَنَّهُم مِّنَ ٱلْعَذَابِ ٱلْأَدْنَىٰ دُونَ ٱلْعَذَابِ ٱلْأَكْبَرِ لَعَلَّهُمْ يَرْجِعُونَ ٢١

We will certainly make them taste some of the minor torment in this life before the major torment of the Hereafter, so perhaps they will return to the Right Path.

Reference: Surah As-Sajdah Verse 21.

Incidents That Changed My Life

Many incidents used to strike me so deeply that at the end of the day, I was forced to think about the life I was living. But three of them are still fresh in my memory and I would like to share them with you.

The Incident of Multan:

There was a concert that happened in Multan and I along with a few friends attended that concert. We were so involved in partying and dancing away the night that we ignored the call to prayers happening alongside the concert.

The night felt so young and I was feeling immensely involved in enjoying the night away when all of sudden a man came on stage and said he wanted to make some announcement. It was obvious in our mind that he wanted to give remarks on the night or how the melody was so good. But when he started speaking, he said something opposite.

He said, “I just came back after praying the prayer from a mosque that is a few blocks away from the site of the concert, and the sounds of songs and your laughter and hooting were reaching that mosque. He said, thank you so much for running our prayer.” He left the stage and he went away.

The words of that man hit me hard as I am a Muslim too but I never paid attention to the call of prayer nor did I care about the people who are standing to answer the call of prayer in the nearby mosques. The feeling of remorse was so strong and it was clenching my heart that I wanted to get rid of it as soon as possible. I tried my best to get involved in dancing and enjoying the night but that feeling never went away.

The Club Incident:

When I was in Islamabad, I used to visit a sports club for routine gym and swimming. I used to come back late at night and on my way home, I used to see some cars parked outside a mosque. On seeing those cars and calls to prayer coming from the speakers of the mosque, the idea of praying along with other devoted Muslims used to ping my mind.

However, the biggest obstacle was ablution which is necessary before performing a prayer. The little energy that was required to make an ablution was lacking which resulted in missing the obligatory prayers at all. Sometimes, I used to pray thinking of swimming as a substitute for ablution. On few occasions, I also used to listen to the lecture that was being delivered after prayer by the shaykh.

While listening to the shaykh, I used to realize how my life is opposite to the life of an ideal or practicing Muslim the shaykh is talking about. An ideal Muslim should never lie, he should never hurt someone, he should never involve himself in haram, and he should stay away from saying filthy words or using filthy language.

While listening to the lectures delivered by shaykh now and then, I started feeling ashamed of myself. I started fighting with my nafs (inner soul) that the life I am living is what I want but the life of an ideal Muslim is what shaykh is delivering and that is the true way to live life but I am completely away from it. That is when feelings of guilt and remorse took place in my heart.

Read the Biography of Tuaha Ibn Jalil

A Day in Islamabad:

It was a fine day in Islamabad when I along with my cousin were roaming around the roads in Islamabad. I wasn’t feeling good from the past few days so we decided to hit the road to soak in some fresh air. In no time, we decided to hit the road with 130 mph speed on our bikes when all of a sudden, I met a terrible accident and suffered deep injuries.

The accident was so severe and I was bleeding so heavily that I thought to myself there was no way I am going to live anymore after all the injuries and bleeding I have gone through. These five minutes of my life changed me completely.

I prayed two prayers to Allah at that time, one to turn me to dust if I am going to die on the spot and the second to give me one more chance as I didn’t want to die like a loser (a lost man as I displeased Allah) despite of having every blessing in life.

Hurdles I Faced While Turning Back to Allah

Whenever you are going to follow the path of Allah SWT, the path of success, you are going to face many hurdles and challenges. However, these challenges are different for different people as shaitan attacks a man from a different perspective. For some, it would be family and for some it would be wealth.

For me, it was haram relationships. I couldn’t help myself to get out of the haram relationships as I was so deeply involved in them. But I said to myself that for the love of Allah, I will give up on the haram relationship too. I messaged all the girls I was in contact with saying that we would never talk ever again. At that time, I didn’t turn against my words and completely left haram relation for Allah Almighty.

Journey to Being a Man of Allah

The day I met that terrible accident in Islamabad, I said to myself I don’t want to die like that person whose life is full of sins and remorse. Allah SWT gave me a new chance, a new life to turn back to the path of success, the path of Allah SWT.

I said to myself that day that I will change the way of my life now as I have seen that the luxuries and enjoyment of life are just an illusion. He said that we invest enormous amount of time, energy and wealth in this life to be successful, to earn a name, and a place in society but none of this will help you in the afterlife except your good deeds and your relation with Allah SWT.

Conclusion

Tuaha Ibn Jalil said while finishing his podcast that by Allah, Allah blessed me with something better and more blessed than the things I left just for the sake of Allah. As I left the music, I started feeling pleasure while listening to the Quran. I left the movies for the sake of Allah and I started finding peace, excitement, and happiness in watching documentaries on Islam.

Completing the podcast, Tuaha Ibn Jalil said, the desire for change has to come from you. Your choice should define you, not the circumstances. You cannot blame the people or environment around you for being a man of this dunya but in reality, it is your nafs that should be controlled.  You have to take steps towards Allah SWT and Allah will bless you in the means you have never imagined. Allah says:

قَالَ النَّبِيُّ صلى الله عليه وسلم ‏ “‏ يَقُولُ اللَّهُ تَعَالَى أَنَا عِنْدَ ظَنِّ عَبْدِي بِي، وَأَنَا مَعَهُ إِذَا ذَكَرَنِي، فَإِنْ ذَكَرَنِي فِي نَفْسِهِ ذَكَرْتُهُ فِي نَفْسِي، وَإِنْ ذَكَرَنِي فِي مَلأٍ ذَكَرْتُهُ فِي مَلأٍ خَيْرٍ مِنْهُمْ، وَإِنْ تَقَرَّبَ إِلَىَّ بِشِبْرٍ تَقَرَّبْتُ إِلَيْهِ ذِرَاعًا، وَإِنْ تَقَرَّبَ إِلَىَّ ذِرَاعًا تَقَرَّبْتُ إِلَيْهِ بَاعًا، وَإِنْ أَتَانِي يَمْشِي أَتَيْتُهُ هَرْوَلَةً ‏”‏‏.‏

“I am just as My slave thinks I am, (i.e., I can do for him what he thinks I can do for him) and I am with him if He remembers Me. If he remembers Me in himself, I too, remember him in Myself; and if he remembers Me in a group of people, I remember him in a group that is better than they; and if he comes one span nearer to Me, I go one cubit nearer to him; and if he comes one cubit nearer to Me, I go a distance of two outstretched arms nearer to him; and if he comes to Me walking, I go to him running.”

Reference: Sahih Al-Bukhari 7405

To listen the complete podcast, click here.